Members of the School Committee; administrators,
faculty, and staff; parents, family, and guests; and, most importantly, members
of the Class of 2018 – it is an honor and a privilege to address you this
evening.
During your time at SHS, you have collectively
achieved many honors in academics, student government, the visual and
performing arts, academic competitions, robotics, speech and debate, and
athletics. I know one of your most cherished memories is when you
experienced an incredible back-to-back triumph.
No, I’m not talking about the two consecutive boys hockey state
championships, but rather something you seniors found even more momentous:
back-to-back snow days this past January. This started a run that included
a total of six cancellations, three two-hour delays, and even one early
dismissal. You’re welcome.
I actually had intended to include the topic of
snow days in these remarks even before some of you referenced the many snow day
calls I made during this past epic winter at Commemoration, and again just now
in my introduction. While my job has many facets, the one that people are
clearly most fascinated with is the power to cancel school due to bad
weather. So, what goes into the decision
to have a snow day? Ouija board? Flip a
coin? Pressure from your clever social media postings the night before the
storm? Pleas from my own three daughters? Nope. Of course, sometimes it’s an easy call, when
the roads are impassable and school parking lots and entrances can’t possibly
be cleared in time. Other times, it’s
very tricky, because the conditions are questionable. Those situations, like many situations in
life, require observation, analysis, and the consideration of principles before
making a judgment. In the case of deciding whether to cancel school, I
observe the road conditions (sometimes while still in my SHS Colonial pajamas);
I analyze the weather forecast; and I consider the most important principle,
which is the safety of students and staff.
However, my decision does not hinge on whether there is any risk
to safety – because there’s always some risk – but on whether holding school
under those conditions will create too great of a risk. Regardless
of what I decide is prudent, I know that some, perhaps many, will disagree with
my decision and criticize me for it. I also know that I could very well
end up being wrong and making a bad decision.
Now, few if any of you are going to become superintendents and need to
know how to decide whether to call off school due to a bunch of snowflakes, but
I think the approach applies more broadly. In fact, in your futures, how
you determine the facts, assess risk, make decisions, cope with disagreement
and criticism, and acknowledge your own imperfections will determine whether
you will affirm – or defy – the pejorative moniker used to label your
generation: namely, that you are a bunch of snowflakes.
You may have heard that your age group has been
described as “Generation Snowflake.” This stereotype stems from the idea that
you can’t handle the metaphorical heat of the “real world” without melting
away; that your ability to cope with difficulty or disagreement is fragile;
that you cannot handle disappointment and failure; and that you cannot tolerate
risk or even discomfort. Some who subscribe to this idea suggest that
it’s all your parents’ fault, because they are “helicopters” who hovered too
close, never allowing you to experience independence and develop
self-confidence, or because they are “snowplows” who cleared away any and all
obstacles and difficulties in your path, never allowing you to experience
failures and consequences. This
stereotype sometimes adds a modifier, as in “special snowflakes,”
suggesting that the adult world has told you all along how unique and amazing
you are, creating a sense of entitlement where you and your parents believe you
should get a trophy just for being you – and woe to the teacher or coach
who suggests that success needs to be earned, not bestowed.
But...I’m not buying into this stereotype.
It’s not that some of these characteristics and behaviors don’t exist,
because they surely do, and they can be very problematic. However,
they have existed in every generation to some degree. I’m sure
certain attributes show up with more or less frequency in certain generations
depending on the times, but suggesting that everyone born between certain
years, and their parents, all act the same is painting with a way-too-broad
brush. Of course, the tendency of one generation to criticize the next as
being less motivated, less respectful, and not as tough as one’s own has
existed throughout human history, and that won’t change (I’ve done it, and
you’ll likely do it someday as well).
So while some may think you’re all snowflakes,
here’s what I know: I know that you’ve worked hard; I know that you’ve
overcome obstacles; and I know that you’ve earned the many accomplishments
you’ve individually and collectively achieved. I also know that you have
been kind, accepting, and thoughtful regarding many of the challenges we face
in today’s society, whether supporting those who experienced natural disasters,
serving the less fortunate, or honoring the victims of school shootings. I
appreciate the sensitivity you’ve shown. Unfortunately, the term
“snowflake” has also become a way in which some seek to disparage those whom
they deem as overly sensitive. While
hypersensitivity is counterproductive, don’t fall for the falsehood that being
sensitive means that you’re weak. Being empathetic, honoring differences, and
considering others’ perspectives are signs of strength. As the late, great
basketball coach, John Wooden, once said: “There is nothing stronger than
gentleness.” Don’t confuse being tough with being callous, which is a problem
every generation in our society is struggling with these days.
However, to live your best lives, you will
need to develop the right kinds of toughness. You will need to develop
the courage to take risks and put yourself in challenging, uncomfortable
situations in order to develop your abilities, and you will need to stand up
for what is right to develop your character. You will need to cope with
disappointment and tragedy. When you do, you’ll be even stronger
than before. As my grandmother often
said, “You can’t come out steel unless you go through the fire.”
I am confident that you have the capability to
defy the snowflake stereotype. To do so, be aware of the facts; be
courageous and prudent when assessing risk; be principled in your decision-making;
be open to learning from those who disagree and criticize; be humble in the
knowledge that you are imperfect and your mistakes will be your own; be
gentle and kind towards others; be resilient when the inevitable challenges and
disappointments come; and be tough when it comes to doing the right thing.
If you are these things, it won’t matter what anyone labels you, because
you will be a person who makes your family, your friends, and yourself, proud.
On behalf of everyone in the Shrewsbury Public
Schools, congratulations, and good luck.
